Written By: Anna Radford
My article for xsisterhoodx this month was going to be about how there seems to be some negative attitudes in straight edge towards those new to it.However, an incident happened tonight that has effectively changed my whole perspective on those not involved in straight edge, and particularly people who I consider to be my friends.After being at university for the past three months I have not had chance to see my friends from my hometown. Tonight we all met to catch up. For some of my friends it was the first time that I had told them about my decision to give up drinking. I guess straight edge is something that the people not involved in it find hard to understand. There were a lot of jokes about it, but all were said in a light hearted manner, and I know that my real friends would never do anything to jeopardize my decision. One of the people I used to consider to be a good friend, however, did something that I consider unforgivable.During the night he asked me if I wanted a drink, so I accepted. I later discovered that he had bought a shot of vodka and put it in the drink without me noticing. Upon telling me what he had done, he actually started laughing. I cannot explain how completely devastated I am. I cannot believe that someone that I consider to be a friend could have so little respect for me, and it is exactly because I consider him to be a friend that I accepted the drink in the first place.I feel completely cheated. Giving up drinking is one of the most important decisions I think I have ever made. I used to go out, get drunk and do things that I constantly regretted. After stopping, I finally felt proud of myself, like I could make myself a better person. I find it hard to accept that this has been effectively taken away from me by another persons ignorance and stupidity.This experience has, however, taught me some lessons. I realize that I never want to drink again. I will never accept drinks from people, no matter how much I trust them. Although in some ways I feel like I have been put back to square one I am, if anything, more determined. People who cannot respect my decisions and who purposefully go against them are people that I do not need in my life. I feel that there is no excuse for his actions. My friendship obviously means nothing to him. I know in myself that if the tables were turned, I could never do that to someone, even if I could not understand their reasons for choosing a certain lifestyle.I am trying to be positive and carry on as if nothing has happened, but I cannot help but feel a sense of emptiness within myself and a large urge to hit the person involved. I also have a headache.My faith in straight edge is still strong. My faith in my friends, however, has been decidedly lowered.